Thursday, April 19, 2007

Bugged by Microsoft

Inching toward the end of a long week full of two-minute tasks that each managed to consume an entire day, I’m beginning to think that like Batman to Robin, Murphy’s Law deserves its own sidekick corollary, Microsoft’s Law. Come to think of it, despite seniority, Microsoft’s Law seems to be the lead hero here. Sorry for the demotion Murphy, but you, of all people, must have seen it coming.

In addition to Microsoft, I am convinced that the following are all out to get me: Time Warner Cable, Hewlett Packard, Verizon and that gigantic Kool-aid mutant—part pitcher, part man—that year after year continues to bust through brick walls without so much as a tiny crack or micro chip. Very creepy: I can see where Jim Jones got his inspiration. Freakishly indestructible artificially-colored beverage containers aside, (he’s probably just meant to intimidate and devoid of any real substance), it is Microsoft who really does seem to be the ringleader of my endless plights. Conspiratorial paranoia ? Perhaps. But one thing is for sure, Microsoft bugs me.

One would think that my having married a computer scientist would have helped the situation; but in fact, it seems to get worse and worse. In the spirit of “know thy enemy” I’ve progressively been trying to learn more and more of the complicated Windows functions. Microsoft, however, has consistently been able to create new bugs faster than my learning curve. (And even if the Kool-Aid man were to defect to my side, I’m sure Microsoftball would still stay ahead of this pitcher’s curve as well).

How their conspiratorial plot is insidious! For years they have been impugning my credibility. Nine times out of ten I am forced to clamor for the cool-headed aid of my beloved computer geek to recover and restore my work. It’s absolutely true: a bitch in time saves nine but 8 ¾ of those times he does exactly the same thing I had been doing for hours on end; save that it works--seamlessly.

24 comments:

Robert said...

Our new scanner is briliant in comparison to the old one, 8 and a half time faster and the images are quite good too!

Rather a lot of work over due at the moment so can't think of anything witty to say this evening.

As I watch the pony an exersise vehicle go by I sometimes wish we could go back and leave the car behind - but not for long!

Robert said...

PS Sorry about the spelling, I would certainly miss a spell checker!!

Blue Genes said...

Speling mystakes are ok with mee. Thanx for taking the time to leave a commmment hear wen your so busy.

(Ouch, some of those mistakes that have grammatical implications were painful to write!)

Robert said...

Well there's typing mistakes and spelling mistakes, I do both quite well. Sometimes it can ve very frustrating.

Hope your Brother's "OK" OKay, you see it isn't that staright forward this spelling lark.

Robert said...

Hope all is well.

Anonymous said...

Me too.

Robert said...

Could you come back? Perhaps in September if not before.

Anonymous said...

If I'm not wrong today is the 20th day of September. Anne, ma sœur Anne, ne vois tu rien venir ?

Anonymous said...

Already November? Ciel !

Anonymous said...

Already 2008? Sky!

Robert said...

Well it is more than a year now but you do have visitors to this blog, one or two a day! see sitemetre.

Anonymous said...

Le mai, le joli mai, en barque sur le Rhin...

Siganus Sutor said...

Another year already gone...

Anonymous said...

Please help me. I just updated the software today for my Iphone. The update came yesterday i believe, anyways, the update includes features like sending and receiving pictures via text message but i don't know how to send a picture. Please some one explain to me how. It would be greatly appreciated.
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Siganus Sutor said...

Plus another year...

Banané quand même. http://mauricianismes.wordpress.com/2010/01/14/banane-bis/

languagehat said...

Alas, poor Blue! I knew him, Noetica, a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy.

Robert said...

July 2010, that's 3 years and a bit! She'll be back. I have bought another new scanner! Don't last long!

Anonymous said...

i am hobby visual artist, is there a chance you like to use some of my pictures? i think it would be fun for your articles :-)
absolutely enjoy your site structure! write me a e-mail please in case you want to colaborate

Anonymous said...

Hello dudes, here is Dan from Canada My hobbies are Athletism and football. I work for a game translation company. Life here in Japan is great!

Siganus Sutor said...

2011 has arrived. It's already February and we can just hope that someone will come out of the blue before the end of December.

Siganus Sutor said...

December is behind the door. Never know what might happen on Christmas Day.

Siganus Sutor said...

Hi Blue Genes. I just happened to think of you today, which is why I am dropping a little hello here. Bye.

Siganus Sutor said...

July 2013 — the world has not been destroyed yet.

Languagehat said...

Fifteen years! The world is still here, but where is BG?